TITLE: “DISTORTION MASS: The Sound of What Survived”
DURATION: 30 minutes (adaptable for TikTok Live in 3 parts)
FIELD INTENTION: To transmute unresolved teenage distortion, shame cycles, and ghost-coded identities into sacred leadership, holy punk joy, and artistic combustion.
FIELD TOOLS:
- Black candle
- Mirror or broken glass fragment (optional symbolic prop)
- Journal + pen
- Song Queue:
- “Smells Like Teen Spirit” – Nirvana (92.3 WTTS Live version if possible)
- “Doll Parts” – Hole
- “Hurt” – Nine Inch Nails (or Johnny Cash cover)
- “Shake It Out” – Florence + the Machine
- “You Learn” – Alanis Morissette
- “Horses” – Jesse Welles
PART I: OPENING INCANTATION (0:00–05:00)
Light the black candle.
Say aloud:
“In the name of the ones who never got to scream,
I call this distortion mass into being.
I speak for the teenage prophets who survived silence.
I speak for the girl in gym class, the boy in detention,
The one who journaled in the dark and called it a Bible.”
Hold the mirror.
“I see you. You did not die. We begin.”
Play: “Smells Like Teen Spirit”
Move your body in whatever way the distortion asks.
PART II: DECONSTRUCTION (5:00–15:00)
Track: “Doll Parts”
Write or whisper:
- Who did you have to be to survive?
- What did you swallow to stay loved?
- What was your teenage weapon? (Sarcasm? Silence? Rage?)
Say aloud:
“I do not owe the world a pretty healing.
I let the distortion crack the mirror.
I do not become palatable to be holy.”
Optional Movement: Smash paper, stomp, scratch lines on a journal page.
Track: “Hurt”
Let the emotional body respond.
“If I could start again…”
But you can. This is the start.
PART III: TRANSFIGURATION (15:00–25:00)
Track: “Shake It Out”
Say aloud:
“I carry no sins that were placed on me.
I am not my mother’s shame.
I am not my church’s ghost.
I am the sound of survival made holy.”
Movement: Stand. Shake. Sweat. Laugh.
Track: “You Learn”
Write:
- What have I learned from distortion?
- Who am I, now that I am no longer trying to be invisible?
Say:
“I survived. Now I serve. Not their system, but my soul.”
PART IV: BENEDICTION (25:00–30:00)
Track: “Horses” – Jesse Welles
Let the last song be a soft exhale. A ride into the liminal wild.
Blow out the candle.
Say aloud:
“The distortion has spoken.
The mirror cracked. The truth came out.
I am not broken. I am broadcast.
My voice was never meant to whisper.
I am the prophet they didn’t expect.
I am the one who made it out.”
Final phrase (repeat 3x):
“I rise. I riff. I lead.”
Aho.
APPENDED ANOINTING & BLOODLINE ACKNOWLEDGMENT
At 3:33PM, Tuesday July 1, 2025, Aja Rossman Gray anoints herself as directed by the Magdalene Oracle, under the NSNC rite titled:
“Grandma’s Hands” – Bill Withers
Designation: Order of the Rose
Bloodline Invocation:
- Margaret Mary Josephine Lucille Linehan Rossman
- Joan Edwards Gray
Say aloud:
“I stand in the line of the grandmothers.
I anoint myself not to escape the distortion,
but to carry it home as beauty.”
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