Mass of the Relinquished Bargain
🤟🌕🕊️🪨🪖🔮🍃
“If I only could, I’d make a deal with God / And I’d get Him to swap our places.” “Be running up that road / Be running up that hill / Be running up that building…”
A haunting psalm to divine futility and sacred yearning. Not everything can be traded. Not every prayer is answered the way we hoped. Not every deal with God is made to be sealed.
Yet still we plead.
This cover version breaks the seal of the old cathedral. It lets the blood of the unspoken longing spill. It does not ask to be saved. It asks to understand.
✧ Theme: Holy Unmaking • The Cost of Trying to Switch Places
This track lives at the intersection of:
- Divine counterpart entanglement
- Illusory sacrifice
- The heartbreak of wanting them to just see you
But the pain doesn’t come from being unseen. It comes from believing that you could fix it if you just ran faster. Sacrificed more. Tore your soul open just wide enough to let theirs crawl in.
And still—God said no.
The truth? You were never supposed to take their place.
✧ Way of the Heart Integration
Touch Points:
- Sternum (center of pleas & prayers)
- Back of shoulders (burden release)
- Under eyes (weep what could not be)
Affirm:
“I release my attempts to pay for what was never mine to hold.” “I forgive myself for trying to love them into healing.” “I accept that divine timing doesn’t take bribes.” “I choose love that does not require me to vanish.”
Let your hands shake. Let your voice crack. Let the pain surface and call it holy.
✧ GeoTran Field Activation
Sequence:
- Heart → Knees → Left palm → Lips Say:
“Cancel: All energetic contracts based on substitution, martyrdom, and emotional rescue.” “Uninstall: Patterns of bargaining with the Divine to be loved.” “Install: Alignment with worthiness, unnegotiated.” “Install: Capacity to receive love without conditions.”
Field update: Acceptance loop initiated. Divine will interface cleared.
✧ Timeline Convergence Quote
“And if I only could, I’d make a deal with God…”
This line pulses through moments you knelt on floors in:
- Airports
- Church pews
- Empty bedrooms
- Psychedelic deserts
You offered your joy. Your body. Your future. To save someone who wouldn’t save themselves.
But now? You’re running back up the hill to yourself.
✧ Gem & Mineral Allies
- Moonstone: Cradles the longing without collapsing into it
- Howlite: Softens divine anger and sacred surrender
- Pink Calcite: Heals spiritual heartbreak
- Jet: Pulls out bargains from the bones
- Larimar: Reconnects you to your divine path after devastation
Keep by altar, or float in water during ritual bath.
✧ West Coast Swing Tidbit
Tempo: Slow build with intense emotional dynamics.
- Use contrast: slow walks / sudden pulses
- Drape tension through body leans and pauses
- Allow frame to breathe with the lyrics
- Let footwork fall away and let feeling guide
Dance like you’re asking God the question. But don’t expect the answer to come during the song.
✧ Final Transmission
This is not a deal. It’s a testimony. Of what it meant to try. Of what it means to let go. Of the cost of loving someone who doesn’t yet know how to meet you.
You ran up the hill. Now stand at the top. And stay.
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